How do you get past lies in church disciplinary councils?
By stillseeking
1/18/2016 11:37:07 PM
What do you do when you Bishop lies about you in a disciplinary council? I'm just scared to say anything, since it would look like I am being rebellious.


Ask them to pray    
"Calmly state the truth. I know calm is probably difficult to come by if lies have been told (I would struggle to be calm!), but as calmly as you can, tell them the truth, tell them how you feel about what has been said, and ask those present if they would be willing to pray for discernment to be able to sift truth from lies.
If possible, approach your bishop directly and clarify the truth. Perhaps he thought he was telling the truth, but made a mistake. I don't know the exact circumstances, but it might be a genuine mistake on his part. Bishops are human and do make errors.
I hope things are resolved soon and that all involved are able to discern the truth. "
posted at 00:00:43 on January 19, 2016 by Anonymous
I am sorry to hear of your pain    
i am sorry that there is stress and disconnet in your life. I believe Anonomoys is right on, obviously easier said than done. I just admitted to my wife a slip I had today which was really really hard, but seeking the truth ,even when it is hard. I can't imagine how difficult it is for you, or what is inovled in your situation. I would also suggest trying to seek to clarify the situation with your Bishop if you can. That is pretty rich coming from me who is struggling to be honest with my own wife. I hope this helps. Hope you have another 24 hours of peace"
posted at 01:09:32 on January 19, 2016 by sjanderson1
Thank you for your comments and support    
"Yesterday when I found this site it was such a relief for me. I've been trying to talk to trusted friends who I think are now getting tired of listening. And for them, they don't know whether to trust or believe me and I'm feeling that confusion is creeping up in their minds. It's just not a good idea in the church to question priesthood authority. So I've been afraid to speak to any church leader or to go to my stake president. So, I am very grateful for this forum and the ability to speak the truth to those who may have ears to hear and hearts to listen. I have a strong testimony of the gospel of Jesus Christ. I know that God lives and that Jesus Christ lives and that they love me. And,also that the Holy Ghost is there to guide and direct all our events here on the earth. Those three things are the only things that remain constant. Even the church changes, even our friends change and certainly the world around us is in constant turmoil. So again, thank you for listening with your heart and responding. I now feel that I have a safe place to just let my feelings out. It's such a good feeling to know that I am NOT alone."
posted at 17:13:38 on January 19, 2016 by stillseeking
I am glad you have found peace    
I am glad you have found peace. It is truly liberating that you can feel at peace here. I am sad to hear that you are having a hard time in a place where you are supposed to be feeling peace, I hope that can change for your soon, and if not that the Lord's peace will be with you while you work through whatever comes you way. Hope your day is filled with peace"
posted at 14:24:41 on January 20, 2016 by sjanderson1
"I really agree with what Anon said. Any time a person is afraid to tell the truth then something has gone terribly wrong. I would only add to what is said, that I would tell your WHOLE truth. I would share that you have hesitated to correct what the Bishop said and why you have been afraid. Be totally open and vulnerable.

There is a possibility that the Bishop is getting his lines crossed and confusing you with someone else he is working with. It is possible that he heard what he expected to hear and didn't fully take in what you were saying to him, and what you were not saying to him. It is possible he is lying for his own reasons. It's possible it's none of the above.They are people. They make the same kind of mistakes we do. Just tell your truth and let the consequences follow. Fearless."
posted at 16:40:27 on January 20, 2016 by maddy

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"Strength comes from uplifting music, good books, and feasting from the scriptures. Since the Book of Mormon was to come forth “when there shall be great pollutions upon the face of the earth” (Morm. 8:31), study of that book in particular will fortify us."

— Russell M. Nelson

General Conference, October 1988